Something Serious, Something Catty

In the ongoing saga of why we’re screwed, Salon ran a piece on how elections can easily be rigged if an election is done on the Diebold AccuVote-TS voting machine. Basically, a group of computer scientists at Princeton hacked the machine and flipped the votes from one candidate to another in under one minute using various easy-to-obtain tools. They chronicled their research in paper. If you don’t want to read the technical paper, but do want to see how they did it, you can watch a video they produced. Just click HERE!

In a methodical, banal, but utterly frightening manner, the video goes through the process of rigging votes and not getting caught. Oh, and the penultimate ‘graph in the Salon piece had this little nugget that will probably cause me to lose sleep:

Diebold spokesman David Bear did not return Salon’s calls for comment on the Princeton study. In the past, he has denied that such security concerns are notable.

“[Our critics are] throwing out a ‘what if’ that’s premised on a basis of an evil, nefarious person breaking the law,” Bear told Newsweek after the March Emery County study. “For there to be a problem here,” he further explained to the New York Times, “you’re basically assuming a premise where you have some evil and nefarious election officials who would sneak in and introduce a piece of software … I don’t believe these evil elections people exist.”

Sleep well, everyone!

Okay, now to “something catty…”

I used to love watching Rachael Ray’s 30 Minute Meals, but now I can’t stand her. But when I was still “in love” with Rachael, I liked watching her make quick meals that looked good. And you know what? Some were good. But, too much of a good thing quickly turned the “Sweet Rachael” (left) into “Monster Rachael” (bottom right). After her 30 Minute Meal gig, she got $40 A Day. Then there was some short-lived Cooking with a Celebrity show that flopped. Now she just has Tasty Travels and Inside Dish all airing on Food Network. Well, that’s in addition to 30 Minute Meals and $40 a Day. That’s four shows on Food Network, in case you lost count.

Anyone who has four shows going at once is bound to be a little fried. But the way Rachael has been acting, I think she been getting a visit from Dr. Feelgood. Why? Because she acts like a manic coke-head these days. She used to smile a lot, giggle a bit, and slowly cook her meals while taking about little shortcuts to make it easier to prepare meals. That was “Sweet Rachael.”

Now, on 30 Minute Meals, “Monster Rachael” has a million things going at once, she’s yelling instead of talking, the smiles have stopped, her food looks gross, and she has these annoying nicknames for almost everything. You know, “E-V-Oh-Oh” for Extra Virgin Olive Oil, “Sammy” for sandwich, the garbage bowl has become “The Ol’ GB,” “Stoup” for a stew/soup kind of meal, and the list goes on.

And on it goes…

Yum-o and Yum Yum
Oh my gravy (Must be “Oh my God!” But c’mon just say it! Say “Oh my God.” Rachael, we all know you swear like a trucker.)

‘Rator (short for refrigerator)

I’m sure there’s more, but what made me really laugh was the Table Talk section of Salon where I got most of these Rachaelisms. There’s a long thread just ripping this poor (well, maybe I should say “unfortunate”) woman to pieces. Click HERE to enter the catty world of Table Talk, and I’ll meet you back here tomorrow for the usual Friday “Mix Six.”
–PK